The number of people rallying to conspiracy views of the world seems to be really shooting up recently. I wonder if that is another symptom of the badly repressed dread overtaking our collective subconscious.

(…)

It dawned on me recently, that a good way to choose a direction in life when you don’t know exactly what it is you’d like to do, is to go for whatever others praised you for in the past. Because that seems like a good way to undertake something you are naturally talented in, or at least something that others have found valuable, which is quite likely to bring you some form of satisfaction or sense of fulfilment.

Not being quite sure of what my contribution could be (or more truthfully, not being able to pursue it currently), I gathered the few activities I had received praise for in the past, and the more I think about it the more it makes sense relatively to the goals I had set for myself or things I knew I would want in a professional occupation (e.g. being able to set my own schedule, autonomy…).

I want to send out a message to all those of you romantically involved: if you find yourself constantly left hanging, if you are dwindling in angst waiting for another person’s acceptance or a sign of affection, if you are constantly at a loss and feeling drained for it, then it is high time to bail.

You might suffer from affective dependence; you might suffer from emotional insecurity. All the same, when you find yourself trailing behind someone in wait for their whimsical attention, then know that you are in a textbook toxic relationship and that it is time to activate the bailout protocol for good ol’ self preservation sake.

Do not flutter, do not ponder, do not cling; it is unnecessary to wait for the worst to happen in hope for the best. Unbalanced relationships such as these might seem intriguing and challenging and all that crap, but that is nothing more than loving what destroys you, like in any other good addiction.

If you can’t muster the strength to cut ties yourself, then talk to someone about it; better even, seek professional help: someone trained and/or experienced in dealing with these situations will be the most efficient at counseling you.

Oh, and bonus point: when you withdraw from their thrall, watch that person turn around and all of sudden offer you the desired attention, like the properly broken human beings they no doubt are. Have pity or sympathy, but in no case give in; for as soon as you’ll be back at grappling for their attention, they’ll turn around and be right back at leaving you hanging. There is no point in verifying a millionth time the age-old saying “Follow me, I’ll flee, flee me, I’ll follow”.